Cords Of Deprivation.

Spam and Heinz never fail to captivate my taste buds. It seems like they made a secret pact at each other to transform a plain evening into a dinner meal I can’t forget. It’s a damn cold night. Woo, Avril Lavigne’s singing in my player. Perfect. Won’t you take me by the hand.

Hold on if you feel like letting go. Good Charlotte rocks with their first single: Hold on.

The dusty guitar, the mirror with cracks of anger from my fists, the dim lampshade, and the electric cords of this laptop: the extension, the AC adapter, the Internet extension cord, the cellphone charger. The smell of Spam fried and toasted to perfection. I still enjoy the company of my room, no matter how messy it is. This completely describes the way I live my life: the way I arrange my clothes in the closet (which is a complete turn-off for girls), the way I alphabetize books, the way I wax my hair. This is me.

High School forced me to do things I don’t want to do.

Host programs. Be an emcee for a Marian Youth Camp, which I consider the worst offer ever. Make a school paper layout. Join Glee Club. Sing religious songs at church. Illustrate Da Vinci’s works. List down the dynasties of China. Dissect a frog. Make a stupid garnishing for Culinary Artds. Teachers were the boss. I am a student. I, for one, am obliged to do these things. (50 Cent – In Da Club, woohoo.)

I just hate doing things which opposes my persona. It’s like, my identity’s lost.

Yesterday, I should be hosting the Marian Youth Camp. But then, I quit. I told myself not to fool myself by telling them how great Mary is. That she conceived Jesus without sin. That she willingly accept Angel Gabriel’s invitation to bear the Son of Man in the womb. If I could remember, the script goes like: Yes. Mother Mary truly serves as a servant for all of us, Christians.

I don’t want to do that. And besides, I didn’t attend since our maid forgot to iron my P.E Uniform – the prescribed costume for the Marian Youth Camp. The fear of disappointing Ms. Espejo (the teacher who hired me), and my partner (Ysabel) slowly diminished. I guess, I’m tired of doing things I don’t want to do.

Konting tiis. Malapit na naman ang graduation.

Tomorrow, I’d be Superman with a silly red sheet. I’d be going to a 6:30 AM mass, followed by an emergency meeting of our school paper at 8. At 11, my partner and I would be making our Investigatory Project finale about Muscovado Sugar – which is, making the products. And lastly, at 2 – would be our inter-class Belen Making contest.

Ipinagkait na naman sakin ang weekend.

Hay. Next Thursday would be our 3rd Periodic Test. Then, Christmas vacation!

~ by utakgago on December 9, 2006.